Not literally of course. The trousers I wear to go fishing are always the correct ones because I only have a single pair - bought for £4.00 from Primark about 10 years ago, these dog turd brown beauties never let me down and have an elasticated waist that expands as I do...

Tags: perch

So, excited at the prospect of fishing a new stretch of the river I met Sean at 1.30pm and we set off, past a beautiful, newly renovated mill and a private pool that was so full of feeding chub that it was almost comical...

Tags: chub

No, not me. The other fella. John Wilson. He's reviewed my book in the Sunday Express...

Tags: 101 Golden Rules of Fishing